Knowing Your Yes

About

NOTE: This page is a daughter page of: Presence

Many people don't fully know you to feel into a "hell yes" versus a "no" or us being conditioned to say yes to appease others or our perceived rules of society. My friend Sam ran a group of us through a great exercise to experience a "hell yes" and a "no".

Visualization Exercise: Knowing your Yes

The exercise involves one person guiding, and one or more people closing their eyes and following. It goes like this:

• No: Close your eyes. Curl up slightly with your head down. Imagine sitting in the shadow of a mountain next to a murky cold water. The weather is gray and cold and sunless. Someone starts slapping your back and encouraging you to go into the water. You can't see who, but imagine them slapping your back harder. It is painful and you want them to stop and you certainly don't want to go into the cold water. It is your duty to your body to tell them to no. They are slapping you even harder now. On the count of three I encourage you to say no as loudly as feels appropriate.... 3... 2... 1... no!
  • Slowly open your eyes.
  • Tell me how that felt in your body.
  • Maybe that was uncomfortable, but maybe it was also empowering, either way shake it off because we are about to practice a hell yes.

• Yes: Close your eyes. Expand and open your chest, look up and breathe in deeply the air. Imagine standing on a mountain in the chill of morning just before sunrise. You are just a little cold, but the air is full of mountain smells and you are excited. You are excited because you can see the sun is slowly rising and lighting up the sky in color. The sun is about to peak over the tree-line. You can already feel the incredible warmth and the sun is about to touch the top of your forehead. You are anticipating the warmth and light hitting your face. On the count of three, the sun will light up your face with warmth... and after I count to three I invite you to say yes..... 3... 2... 1... yes!
  • Slowly open your eyes.
  • How did that feel in your body?
  • I want you to consider now that we had a strong no and a strong hell yes. In reality, there is a huge spectrum in between... but if you are asked to do something and you are unsure. You can close your eyes and think: "do I want this right now". Maybe you want to answer "not right now thank you", with your names hands. If it's not a hell yes, then it is a no... and only when we hear a no from a person, can we really appreciate and be in wonder of a hell yes.
  • Finally, don't forget that a yes can become a no, or a pause at anytime. And that applies in dance, in intimacy and all areas of life.

Hell yes to sunrise.

Links

• The Cube (game) - A more detailed visualization personality test.

Acknowledgements: The incredible Sam Kennedy who I met in Guatemala and showed us this exercise. He learned this from Cary French.